Friday, August 24, 2012

On Death and Dying : Expiry Date.....

'life is just 3 breaths. 
The one you had just expired, 
the present one not yet completed, 
and the next yet uncertain..'
nik howk

Two weeks prior to Eidul Fitri, in between my busy clinic, I get some frantic sms's  from my sister from the Outpatient Centre,University Hospital, PJ,
"Mom got cancer of the breast ! She is sobbing plus plus, inconsolable..."

Later in the evening I visited her at home. She was restive and seemed to accept the diagnosis with a lot more calm and dignity, expected of her age , being 80. Some words of consolation and advice exchanged. Some words of reassurance regarding plan and treatment. Rida and acceptance played a big part here...Alhamdullillah.

The 'Big C' is always shocking at any age for anybody but I persuaded my mom to look at things in the proper perspective. The perspective of the 'Expiry Date',  as I put it bluntly. All of us mere mortals will finally exit this world and would go to the next. That we have to accept the moment we are born. Something most of us would not want to think about.

When we are 80, 70 or even 60, we are reaching the end part of our 'Expiry Date', only that we do not wish to know. Of course some of us are unlucky enough to even 'expire' before 60, even for some in their early 30's from motor vehicle accidents, serious debilitating infections etc and etc. Unfortunately these premature exit come so suddenly, we are never even 'ready'. Family members are caught with even 'more unreadiness', thus giving rise to anger with 'the care givers', the situations bringing these premature demise, and in some cases even God himself !

From this perspective, having the 'Big C' at say 70, 80 or even when one is just beyond 60 [ Allah forbid, insyaallah ! ], is actually a 'gift' !
My God !, you may say this 'Doc have gone bonkers !'.
I plea for you to look from the perspective of the 'Expiry Date', which is inevitable and certainly very unlikely to be 90 and definitely not 100. Only our 'heedlessness" make us never wanting to think about it.
Then it  can become clearer are actually been given another 'Expiry Date'.  A 'renewal of contract' after the expiry of the previous one, so to speak as if a contract given after the retirement age....a gift.

Shorter no doubt, but tangible and something to work on.
Putting aside the massive oncological advancement  and medical care this age can offer :

You have time to ponder and accept
and atone and 'taubat'
and 'doa' and 'solat' and whatever.
There is kaffarah thrown in
there is constant zikrullah to give solace,
there is 'rida' and most importantly,
there is your conciousness,
yet still vastly intact.

Very hard to swallow....Think.

Some short doa's but  deep with meaning :
..Hasbunallah wa ni' mal Wakeel.
[ Allah suffice for me, He is al Wakeel ]
..Hasbiyallah hula ila Hailla alai hitawakkal tuwa huwa Rabbul arsil Azim.
..Allahumma inni a'uzubikamin sarri nafsi
[ Oh Allah, I seek refuge from you from the evil of my naf ]
..Ya mukallibal qulub thabit qalbi ala ka dinik
Ya mukallibal qulub thabit qalbi ala ka taatik
[ Oh the One who changes hearts firm my heart in your Din,
.Oh the One who changes hearts firm my heart in your obedience ]
..Bismillah himajreha wamursaaha innaRabbi la Ghafur rurRahim
[ In the name of Allah, the anchor and the journeying, He is al Ghafur, al Rahim ]

Other related articles in the blog :
1. On Dying, Death and Life After Death

2. Redza

3. Death and Dying revisited..Steps To Jannah

4. Death and Eternal Life After Death

5. Longevity

6. Still On Happiness

7 Guest Editorial : Veiled Muslim Women and Boozing Western Intellectuals

No comments: